It’s ugly. It’s bitter. And it’s excruciatingly painful.
Everyone’s got one of those moments. I’ve had them too. In fact, I had it today during one of my coaching calls. Just not happy with the way it went. Sure, the client still benefitted from the session as the overall objective was met. But I still felt inadequate as if something was missing. And I was right. I went off the process (a little) a forgot to ask a critical question or two that would’ve helped the client gain deeper insights making it all the more valuable to her.
Now, if this seems a little too obsessive — you’re probably right. It is. But I’m not in for fun but to be the best. And I think you and I know, mastery requires some level of obsession.
Here’s my great learning from today’s incident — give yourself space to breathe.
I think I set myself up for failure right at the outset. By blocking out three calls in a row (including this coaching call) I’d put myself under unnecessary pressure despite that the last call got pushed off by an hour right at the tail end of my coaching conversation. The result my subconscious kept prodding me about the upcoming call and other disruptive thoughts. I did a shoddy job of being fully present at the moment.
I know the solution to this but I’m reflecting on why I didn’t do anything about it in the first place. Couldn’t I see it coming? What was I thinking? Oh, wait — I know what was I thinking — I had superpowers or so I thought.
It would make a fascinating study as to why we overestimate our capabilities and think we can do it all. I’ve known it from experience — the most productive people operate the best with empty spaces (lots of them) in their calendars. Perhaps that’s the reason why hacks like the Pomodoro technique work so well when stakes are high we ought to get things done.
If you know what I’m talking about I guess it’s time for us to act a little mature and accept the fact that even superheroes need a break! Unless you want to be reminded how your superpowers suck when stakes are high.
Make space. Breathe.