-
Maybe, you are naive!
An exciting prospect called the other day. He was looking for a coach who could help him resolve some of the interpersonal challenges he faced the past few years. In his words, “my inability to make things work with the people around me have set me back by at least 4-5 years, and it’s demotivation…
-
Speaking when angry
Using your emotional volatility as a management tool is a bad strategy. Yet we know of managers and leaders who do precisely that; surprisingly, to some degree of success. It sure does get people’s attention. But if throwing temper tantrums is their tool for exacting change, I wonder what they have to say about the…
-
Adding too much value
A classic problem that almost every successful and competent leader has is this overwhelming desire to add their two cents to every discussion. And I mean every-single-discussion. It’s damn irritating. I know because I used to be one of them. The challenge with accomplished leaders (and you will see a lot of this among military…
-
Making destructive comments
Destructive comments are the cutting, sarcastic comments we let fly with or without intention. They serve no other purpose than to put people down, hurt them, or assert themselves as “superior.” They are different from comments that add too much value. This type of comment adds nothing but pain. Are you making destructive comments? It’s…
-
Passing Judgement
It’s easy for leaders to fall into the trap of rating others and imposing their standards on others. What starts with some helpful ‘opinions’ usually morphs into targeted judgment. Don’t believe me? Well, have you ever expressed approval or disapproval about something or someone? If the answer’s yes, that’s judgment, my friend. It’s much different…
-
Winning too much
I once asked my friend about his “greatest weakness”, if any. And he coyly mentioned “winning too much” and how it has ruined many relationships in the past. Of course, that got me curious, and I encouraged him to elaborate further. He mentioned how competitive he’s been all his life and how that streak set…
-
The performance curve
High performance has been a buzzword for decades now. Far too long than it should’ve been. Not that I’m against high-performance or something, it’s just that we can’t quantify what high performance means in this age of radical disruption. Everyone’s got an idea or an opinion on what what a high performing individual, leader or…
-
The FUEL coaching model
Bumped into the FUEL coaching model last week and I’ve been fascinated by its simplicity and ease of use. I wouldn’t call it a step up from the GROW model of coaching but an alternate framework to try out with your clients. If you’re asking “why the heck would I try out something new during…
-
Good questions inform; great questions transform!
Steve Jobs asked one profound question that transformed Apple from the verge of bankruptcy to a trillion-dollar company! What was the question? “Who is Apple and where do we fit in this world?” And here’s how he articulated the response to his question: What we’re about is not making boxes for people to get their…
-
When shouldn’t you hire a coach?
I’ve been getting a lot of queries for coaching services lately. And as much as I love to coach someone professionally/personally, not everyone makes the cut. I end up refusing more than half of the leads that come through. Why? Because for the most part, the potential clients aren’t ready to get coached! Here’s the…